not use data bound controls

I am a long time VB programmer (VB3 to VB6) just getting into c#.  I have always hated data bound controls.  You lose too much control over the data, the data validation, editing, updating etc. etc. 

For example (but not the only issue) a user starts to edit the data for a customer.  When they get to the state field the realize the don't know so they try to hit the cancel button so the can go and find out.  The validation says the MUST enter a state and does not allow the cancel.  I know they could enter a fake state, but (1) this stinks - enter fake data just to exit a screen, (2) they are from a foreign country and do not have a clue as to what fake data to enter.

I am looking for a good book or source to learn ado + c# that DOES NOT focus on data binding.  I have spent way too much time searching the net on this issue.  Any information would be a big help. 

Please do not say "just use data binding" that is the whole point of this request.